Narratives of the Disengaged: The Job Search

AC Nielsen Job Search Privacy Statement

I suppose this should not come as a shock to some, and to be honest, doesn't really shock me either. However, it did confirm my fears as to why I never submit an application online.

I was prepared to send AC Nielsen my resume when I spotted a Job Search Privacy Statement located in the Careers section of AC Nielsen's web site. In short, it basically states, "Submitting your data is completely voluntary, but in certain circumstances we can do whatever we want with your data at will." Not to mention, "In the event of a merger and/or acquisition....you're fucked."

For further reading, click on the link (PDF file). Be sure to pay particular attention to #5 Data Disclosures:

AC Nielsen's Job Search Privacy Statement

10 Things that Scream 'I Sincerely Don't Want Work For You'

I am a stickler when it comes to time management, and regard such as a very precious commodity. If I feel I'm wasting time on repetitous things, I get perplexed. Ok, cranky. I especially find it irritating when other people take advantage of my time, as if I have nothing better to do. The truth is, I really don't, but others don't really have to know that.

Another thing that chafes me is arrogance. An attitude that exults superiority. What happens if you mix 'arrogance' and 'time-waster' together? An ostentatious work environment. No thanks, I'll pass.

It's funny to me how there are enormous amounts of articles written online and in print about what turns off hiring managers and recruiters during a job interview. Jobseekers are reminded constantly about the ruler to the hand if you dare say or do the wrong things during an interview. Hiring managers take full advantage of the ball being in their court, and with that, comes pompous attitudes in some cases. Where are articles on that, I wonder? Are jobseekers to believe that interviewees are masters of perfection and they should be viewed separately from the company as a whole? Are we to believe that their actions should not reflect the opinions of the company?

One of the major pet peeves from hiring managers during interviews is arrogance. I can agree with that, but here lies a shocker: it works both ways.

Below are ten warning signals that I take into account as far as potential employment with a company. Please note: these elements are based on ACTUAL events that took place during past interviews:

Blame Fido for the recession. It's all the rage!

Before you start reading the world's longest blog post, let me just begin by stating I do not have children of my own. Many will argue that if I had children, my stance on my position would change. I regret to inform you that my position would NOT change, because I am NOT a wishy washy kind of girl. Everyone, including the four-legged variety, has blood running through their veins, they have feelings, and they communicate. Just because an animal does not manipulate words and sentences in the same manner humans can, that doesn't make them less worthy. If you think otherwise, stop reading NOW and go back to your internet porn....or whatever you were doing previously. Meanwhile start chanting....

...repeat after me: unemployment is not my pet's fault. Unemployment is not my pet's fault. Keep chanting that until it finally settles deep inside your brain.

I know the economy is bad. I am well aware that people, including myself, have lost jobs due to the disparity that is the recession. We all have to make due with what we have, fix what is broke as opposed to buying new, clip coupons, and eliminate frivolous spending. I do not consider any type of care for your pet as "frivolous." It saddens me greatly to hear about people giving up their pets, as they don't have the money to care for them any longer. After all, as far as our society is concerned, it's easier to dump your pet to a place where they will receive "better" care. What our society doesn't realize, "better care" equates to eternal peace. Is it really fair to take your supposed once-loved four-legged friend to a strange animal shelter, and cut the pet's life short? To the people who have given up their pets because they could no longer afford them: can you HONESTLY say you have exhausted all measures of money-saving methods? Did you make the switch from Merrick's dog food to Purina? Did you eliminate the bonus treats from your pet's diet? Most importantly...did you take the time to speak with the veterinarian for advice on the care and well being of your pet during these rough economic times? Have you even thought about/discussed arrangement of a payment plan with the veterinarian so that the pet can get the care it deserves? That's not possible, you say? I say that is BULLSHIT. I am willing to bet that most people did not go the extra mile. That just infuriates me, because the mentioned alternatives are indeed POSSIBLE. Here is my story....

In April of 2007, my cat (Pookie) was diagnosed with feline diabetes. At that time, I had an advantage, as I was working for the animal clinic at the time of his diagnoses. That meant I got all exams, treatments, and medications half-price as an employee discount. At first, he was put on Glipizide, but that didn't seem to do much as far as regulation. After a month of very little progress, I decided to go full force and go the insulin route. Naturally, my veterinarian was elated over my decision, and immediately prescribed a beef/pork insulin at $40 a pop. With insulin, syringes are needed, which is $30 for a box of 100. Then comes the frequent initial glucose screenings (glucose screenings are mandatory to adjust the dosage). By the way, all mentioned costs include the employee discount.

More Job Interview DON'T's

I came across this video of the Step Brothers. I love how they harass the HR lady. This reminds me of one my earlier blog posts. Funny!

The Duplicity of "Job Creation"

I had the opportunity to take part in yesterday's mayoral election for my town, and take advantage of my civic duty. I had a little glimpse of excitement, though I'm not really sure why. As it turned out, my most exciting detail of my excursion was that I ran into my old Bikram Yoga instructor, but I didn't say anything to her because I didn't want to have to explain why I haven't been showing up for class lately (how do you say, "because I have no job and no money for class" in a cheerful way? Feh.). I quickly got a glimpse of her and then turned my attention to the ballot....with disgust. I should have put the pen down and chatted with my instructor while I had the chance.

There were two dominate candidates: one is an incumbent that have been mayor in this town for the last fifteen years, or thereabouts. The other is a fresh-faced write-in candidate, who couldn't get her name on the ballot because there was a legality issue with the signatures she obtained on her petition. She has no prior experience in the political scene, but she has a gazillion certifications in almost every field. Both candidates have promised the creation of jobs. I have already observed what the incumbent has done with that platform....which was nothing at all.

Poem for 8.5% (8.1% Revisited)

This is "Poem for 8.1% Revisited" It's the same poem I published last month only this time the index has been changed to reflect current information. Also, I revamped the last four lines. No, not proud. Too tired to think of an entirely different poem. Most likely, I will have that opportunity next month.

**************************************

It was reported on my news just today
that even MORE jobs have willfully gone astray
I can't say that I'm surprised by this
because everyone around me is getting a diss

Damn you employers, we know you don't care
A large part of me thinks you're full of hot air.
Kids and pets everywhere need to be fed
and now we have to struggle to pay for bread

Actually, my situation is not that bad
But there are others who are hungry and sad
More people losing their cars and their homes
Or they're just thinking in awe, and talking to gnomes

Off to the unemployment office I go!
There's a long line - I cringe and I woe
I look around to find people as cranky as me
Wondering if this is the way things are supposed to be.

I couldn't wait anymore, my patience has run dry
I've grown bitter and cranky and left wondering why.
I've now realized what makes the employers tick
especially YOU, <omitted>, for your pathetic tactic.

I spend much of my time watching tv and the news
clean house, do the laundry and making some stews.
This is what my typical day is like
But I don't approve, and not good for my psych.

I feverishly peruse the Monsters, the Careerbuilders, and other useless boards
Because there is a little bit of hope - but in the end, they're ALL whores.
I network and spread the word to everyone I encounter
The only response I get is, "My company's not hiring - since when you're for hire?"

I could start my own business, and be happy that way
That idea got nixed - where is the money so I can pay?
No one will buy anything, except for staples,
and buy that I mean, milk, bread, and maybe some apples.

To you, 8.5%, I know you have no control
over this madness of letting the good people go
Now we shall expect profit margins to rise
while I'm secretly wishing for these company's demise.

Karma is everything, or so I'm told,
what comes around, goes around, and I soon will find gold.
I'm not really good at poems as you can tell,
but this isn't to say that I soon will prevail.

Back in the day, job searching wasn't that hard
There were jobs, good resumes, and the interview- you're hired.
There's no such things as a "strategy" as some job coaches will say
Because these are the folks that take advantage of unemployed, go away!!

For those with jobs, I hope you have sense
You could be next - there goes your dollars and cents.
Be nice to those around you, a smile goes a long way.
Because one day you may find your job gone and astray.

To you, 8.5%, these are tough times
we've been through this before, but this time
with crappy rhymes.

Be happy, be strong, and don't lose faith
Eat cookies, your veggies, and probably some cake.
Don't lose hope and submerse in some joy
When things will turn around, that means 'oh joy!'

How To Achieve World Peace by Firing Yourself

All throughout my career I've overheard numerous comments from colleagues relating to disdain and inconvenience relating to their job. People choose to whine, bitch, complain about the little details, because that's the easy way out rather than focusing on doing what they were hired to do to begin with. The phrase, "if you don't like your job....quit" is nothing further from the truth. That is exactly what I did in the summer of 2004.

I realize that was a very dumb move. I can't help but ponder had I decided to stay and suck it up, would I even still be there today? The answer to that would most likely have been 'no.' My last employer recently undergone major staff cuts and did not exclude employees that have been there for fifteen or more years. I was just shy of my four year anniversary with the company.